We talked in an earlier post about how God has numbered our days. So the question is what am I afraid of? I’ll answer that question below, but first I  want to set the stage.

Stationed for 3 years in Germany on an Army base, my family took every opportunity to travel all over Europe. We went to the Worlds Fair in Belgium, visited every castle we could find open to the public, walked up the leaning tower of Pisa in Italy and played on the beaches in Spain.

On this particular trip we were headed to Spain. There on the beautiful golden sand beach I picked up a plethora of sea shells and when we returned to the Hotel I wanted to clean them. But there was no water in the swimming pool.

It wasn’t a standard type pool with a shallow end and a deep end this one was a single level and it was deep. I have a picture of my Dad standing on the floor of the empty pool which they had drained to refill with fresh water. In those days there was no such thing as filters or those little scrubby cleaner thingy.(I’m talking about 1950’s)

But by  the next morning they had filled the pool. I looked out from the patio, saw the sun sparkling off the surface water and decided it was the perfect time to go and clean my shells. Of course I took off and didn’t tell my parents. I was a fast four-year- old with a specific goal in mind.

There were people of all ages sitting at tables under umbrellas eating. I didn’t give any thoughts to them, but I’m sure a tiny blonde-haired girl with a funny straw cone hat running toward the pool drew some attention.

I knelt down on the concrete and had to lean way over to reach the water when sure enough in I went head first. No I had never learned to swim, but after this incident, Mom signed me up at the YMCA.

It was a surreal sight. Like glittering diamonds the sun’s rays sparkled through the water giving it a yellowish green tinge. Bubbles drifted up toward the surface and my straw hat bobbed around above. I’m sure I wasn’t too far under the surface because a hand reached down, grabbed me and pulled me up out of the pool.

It was a young man from one of the tables that saw me fall in, or it was my guardian angel. But God granted me life that day.

So back to the question ‘what am I afraid of’?

Yes to those who guessed drowning, but I’ve learned over the years I’m afraid of not get air into my lungs. Is that a part of the “I’m afraid of drowning” thing? I find that when anyone talks about breathing or take a breath or anything associated to those trigger words, I immediately take a deep breath. Like I did just now. Weird!! Has this detoured into a phobia?

I shudder at the thought of deep water, but that hasn’t stopped me from going on cruises (no matter how many disaster movies I’ve watched with them sinking or tipping over). It hasn’t stopped me from rafting down white water rapids (of course I’m not crazy,  they were just baby ones!) I’ve snorkeled in Hawaii, well from laying on a boogie board and just sticking my face in the water, but hey I stuck my head in.

The funny thing is I’m drawn to the ocean. Look but don’t touch is my motto, though who can go to Hawaii and not play in the surf. You can’t see me, but I’m raising my hand. LOL

It took only one time on a boggy board with the current keeping me from making landfall and that was enough. But that is another story for another time.

Almost drowning has given me many nightmares through the years that were so vivid that I can remember them to this day, maybe I’ll share that sometime. These, thank the Lord, have diminished, maybe it’s because I stay away from anything deeper than my bath tub. LOL

What this fear hasn’t done is stop me from going to sleep every night with the pounding of the surf on my sound machine, but that is as close as I get to deep water.

So what are you afraid of?





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